Sunday, January 19, 2014

Advice should be chargeable

They always said that no matter how hard you try, your past comes back haunting you. You can try to hide it, amend it, delete the traces, destroy the evidences - that doesn't kill it. That just makes it dormant. It comes back to life the moment it gets the sunlight called opportunity. Or people. 

I have rarely felt guilty about my acts. No matter how big or small the mistake is, I have always accepted it, amended it and moved on. Guilt is one emotion I would never want to feel. Nor would you. For, it kills you from within. But these things are not always in our hands. We are yet to be heartless enough not to feel anything. We are yet to be nice enough to never do anything wrong to anyone. It's normal and natural to feel guilty about certain acts. But the key is not to let it rule you. Your life. Your people. And most importantly, your decisions. 

How easy it is to talk when you're not talking about your life. Some well learned person (read yours truly) once said "दुनिया का सबसे आसान काम है ज्ञान बांटना|" We are natural at giving unwarranted advice. Even to strangers. If you see someone crying at the beach, or in the train or a park, you walk up to that person, ask him or her as to what happened, try to console her even if she asks you to leave her alone, give her unsolicited advice even if she shares just a small part of her problem just so that you stop disturbing her. How we fail at minding our own business. 

Some look at it as a good deed. They think that it's good to help those who are sad. And some are even willing to accept the help. Maybe because they have nobody to talk to, or nobody understands them, but the probability of that happening is pretty low. Most of the times people who are crying in Public places wouldn't care about what you think about them, thus they wouldn't care about what you have got to say either. 

Writing a blog post on phone is a pain. Especially when you're not able to sleep because you have a lot of things on your mind. You do not know what or how do you feel at this moment. But you need to vent out. Thus you take the pain and risk of typos and write a post. But the worst part is, deciding the header. After writing the entire post, I haven't yet decided on the header. Sigh. 

Ps: Found the header. It maybe totally irrelevant, but what the heck! 


  1. This one rang a bell! ;)

    Guilt really does eat your inner peace...

  2. This style, to leave the flow suddenly, to change the topic and end the topic hanging is pretty rare. Sometimes I hate it. Sometimes I amaze How you always do it..

  3. Yup we are so bad at minding our business. I think its ingrained... an unconscious activity... that just gets triggered as soon as we see someone we think is helpless.
    I am awkward at consoling people. Maybe because I am on the borderline of being narcissist ... see in the comment too I write about myself :P

  4. To me it comes suddenly and naturally .
    I know,some people might consider it to be an interference in their persona issues,but,you are only trying to help the person

  5. It really depends on the way you try to approach & console people who are crying in public places. In general we just ask them their problem and then we say few nice words or just finish off saying 'Everything's going to be okay'. But if you share your story of personal loss or tragedy (if you have one or heard of one) and how you were able to overcome that and be sane, most of the time it works !
    But again everyone's entitled to their opinion. You have generalized that most of the folks crying in public do not need our help based on your experiences on what you have seen in life till now but which is completely opposite to what I saw. BTW this is a very Good Post !